


In the end, it's still you and I

by walshisaweedbrain



Category: SKAM (Spain)
Genre: Dorks in Love, F/F, Post Season 2, a bit of fast forward maybe, croana getting ready for university
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-27
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-20 18:54:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19382716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/walshisaweedbrain/pseuds/walshisaweedbrain
Summary: "Minute by minute is good, but minute by minute with you is much better."Or...Cris and Joana start to think about what the future has in store for them and what does it mean to face it together, minute by minute.





	In the end, it's still you and I

 

 

Cris didn’t like to admit it but she was sulking. The days seemed infinitely long and hot and goddamn _boring_.

 

She usually liked summer, all the time that she could spend with her friends and partying without having to worry about waking up for school the morning after. And, of course, now there was also Joana.

 

Cris liked everything more when Joana was around her and there was no way to hide that. Even her mom, slowly and reluctantly at first, had finally accepted that her daughter was happy with a girl by her side. Cris didn’t say it out loud many times, but she was proud of what she had achieved with her parents, coming a long way from their daily fights about her grades at school and how irresponsible she was.

 

And Joana… Joana had been there all along. They had just finished their last year of _bachillerato_ and Cris was proud to announce that her fingers were not enough to count the months they had been together anymore.

 

_More than one year -_  the voice in her head reminded her.

 

So, yes, she was happy and proud and in love, but God she was really sulking those days. Joana was away to visit some family in Argentina, Nora was back in America for the summer and Amira was on holiday with her parents as well. Eva and Viri were the only two still in Madrid, but Cris’ parents had insisted so much in spending a couple of weeks in Zaorejas and Cris was not allowed to bring anyone else with her.

 

“A family holiday only.” had been her mum’s words. “Your uncles and grandparents won’t see you for a while when you go to University, so make the most of your time with them.”

 

And while Cris could agree to spend time with her relatives, if there was something she didn’t want to think about was University.

 

“You could go anywhere, Cris.” Joana had told her one afternoon, while they were lazily finishing their homework in Cris’ room, bodies tangled in a comfortable position.

 

There was no way for them not to touch each other somehow as soon as they were close to each other. Cris had even made a joke about how naturally her hands reached for Joana’s the moment she laid eyes on her.

 

“I know I could go anywhere, but that’s the point… I don’t know where I want to go.”

 

Joana had smiled fondly and pressed a kiss to the corner of Cris’ mouth.

 

“You still have time to think about it, _sapito_ , and if you really don’t want to go to Uni then you can always take a gap year, you could work and see if you prefer it that way.”

 

Cris had sighed, closing her notepad and clicking her pen shut.

 

“I don’t know… what are you going to do?”

 

Joana hadn't answered right away; instead, she had bit her lower lip and tapped the pencil against the page she was currently doodling on.

 

“Radio silence?” Cris poked at her ribs and Joana jolted on the bed.

 

She reached for her backpack on the floor and pulled out a thin envelope of paper offering it to Cris.

 

Cris frowned and tilted her head for a moment, before accepting it and starting to read what was inside. When she raised her eyes to meet Joana’s anxious expression, Cris couldn’t help but jump forward and kiss all over her face.

 

“Oh my god! They accepted you! You got in! Why didn’t you tell me about it?”

 

Joana smiled shyly.

 

“It arrived just a couple of days ago and I don’t know… we talked about it, remember?”

 

“Of course I remember,” Cris nodded eagerly. “but you didn’t tell me you sent the application already.”

 

Joana shrugged and played with some of her still purple locks of hair.

 

“I decided to send the early application so I could actually decide what other options I had in case they did not accept me.”

 

Cris beamed again and pressed a sweet but long kiss on her girlfriend’s lips.

 

“Jo, this is amazing, I am so proud of you… you are going to study in one of the best Universities in Spain and you’ll kill it there!”

 

Joana’s smile grew bigger and her hands intertwined with Cris’.

 

“Thank you, Cris, I mean it. Look, the reason why I was unsure to tell you about this was just because I didn’t want you to feel the pressure to choose something for your future if you’re not sure.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

Joana pushed the envelope behind her with little thought.

 

“I know that Amira and Nora already have a pretty clear idea of what they are going to do after this year and Viri and Eva are also always talking about it… I didn’t want you to feel left out of the picture, as if we’re all leaving you behind, because that’s not true. I am not leaving you behind.”

 

Cris was so lost remembering that moment that she almost missed the sound of her phone on the nightstand. It was a different one from her usual tone, so she immediately knew it was Joana and she launched herself forward to grab the device.

 

The Wifi of her house in Zaorejas wasn’t the best, but, thankfully, Joana’s face appeared on the screen without a glitch and her warm smile ignited the fire in Cris’ chest.

 

_Oh, how she missed her._

 

“Hola, _guapa_.”

 

Cris smiled back, happiness overtaking her.

 

“Hey you, how is it going? Having a blast in Argentina?”

 

“Honestly, they’re even crazier than what I remember, but I am having a good time.”

 

Cris nodded, glad to see Joana so relaxed and carefree.

 

“I miss you.” came out of her mouth without even thinking about it and she immediately saw Joana’s expression softening.

 

“Ohw, baby, I miss you too. Sorry that we’re spending so much time apart this summer, but my family and I have been postponing this trip for years now, we couldn’t say no this time.”

 

“No, no, I perfectly understand. You have family there and it’s only fair that you go and visit them.” Cris nodded, trying to convince herself more than Joana.

 

Her girlfriend reached for the camera on her phone, as if she wanted to touch Cris’s face and blew her a kiss in the wind.

 

“I can’t wait to have you in my arms again, I love you Cris.”

 

Cris blushed and she wondered if Joana’s words would ever stop having that effect on her.

 

“I love you too.” she said back, looking at Joana biting her lower lip with a radiant smile.

 

“I can’t really talk much at the moment, time zones and everything, but I promise I will call you again as soon as possible, alright?”

 

Cris felt the disappointment seeping through her stomach, but she held a smile for Joana and nodded.

 

“Okay, have fun, _guapa_. I will cling to your shirt until you get back.”

 

Joana sent her another virtual kiss and waved her hand.

 

“Sleep well, _sapito_.”

 

Almost as soon as the call ended, Cris couldn’t help but picture the same thing happening in a few months, when Joana would be in Barcelona and she would be… well, she still had no idea.

 

Barcelona was not too far away – six hours with a car or a bus Cris could definitely do for Joana – but, nonetheless, she wondered if and how their relationship was going to change.

 

What if Joana started to feel as if she couldn’t share her new experiences because Cris was not able to understand her? What if she met someone new? What if first love didn’t really mean love for life?

 

Cris knew that they liked to joke about it but, somewhere along the lines, it started to turn into something more serious. Why would she even want to look in someone else’s direction if Joana was right next to her? Why would she feel the need for another pair of lips, other hands caressing her body, other eyes to stare at her with such love and devotion?

 

And that was the point, she didn’t want anyone else and she knew that it was the same for Joana. But what would happen when things needed to change? Would they welcome that change or would they crumble under the pressure of it?

 

Joana always said that change stirred something inside her and it had been such an old truth that she wasn’t even sure it depended on her illness. Maybe it was just her, maybe it was just Joana… after all, Cris mulled, she herself didn’t take change so warmly as well.

 

Her train of thoughts was interrupted by her phone once again, but this time it was Amira trying to reach her.

 

Her best friend seemed to be having a lot of fun and Cris couldn’t help but being truly happy for her, even though she was stuck in boring Zaorejas.

 

“How long will you be trapped there?” joked Amira in the middle of a laugh.

 

Cris shrugged.

 

“Next five days at least, and then I hope my family will take pity on me and drive back to Madrid.”

 

Amira was about to speak again but Cris’ voice interrupted her before she could say a word.

 

“Can I ask you something?”

 

“Of course.”

 

“What would you say if I’d tell you that I-uh could go to study in Barcelona?”

 

Amira widened her eyes and a big smile lit up her whole face.

 

“WHAT? You received an offer from Barcelona and didn’t tell me anything? Damn Cris, you didn’t even tell me you were applying.”

 

“I didn’t- I was not sure if I was going to get in and I didn’t want to put everyone’s hopes up… you know how my parents get about it.”

 

“Yeah, but-oh wait! Isn’t Barcelona’s Uni the same one Joana applied for?”

 

“Yes.” Cris answered bashfully.

 

“Holy mother, girl! What did she say about it? Are you guys going to live together or…?”

 

“Calm down, calm down, tiger.” Cris chuckled. “Joana doesn’t know about it either.”

 

“What? Why?”

 

Cris bit her lip and her gaze fell to her hands.

 

“I don’t… I haven’t replied to the offer yet, I don’t even know how to tell Joana.”

 

Amira frowned in confusion.

 

“What’s there to tell more than just the truth? Weren’t you scared about her going away and you guys being at distance?”

 

“Yes, but what if she thinks that I only did it to be with her? What if we actually need to be apart for a while and see where life brings us?”

 

Her best friend shook her head and cracked an affectionate smile.

 

“Oye Cris, did I tell you how silly you are at times?”

 

Cris stared back at Amira unimpressed.

 

“I am serious, Amy.”

 

“So am I. Look, I get what you mean, but I just feel like you’re making all of this up in your mind without even knowing what Joana thinks. Why wouldn’t she want you there? I’m sure that she also has her fears about what this big change will bring to the both of you.”

 

“I know that she wouldn’t mind having me there,” Criss resonated. “but what if she thinks I am being too clingy or some shit…?”

 

Amira actually laughed hearing the words.

 

“Cris, are you hearing yourself? You’re talking as if you didn’t know Joana. She would love to have you there and if you’re scared about moving too fast, then you don’t have to get an apartment together. You would have different friends and different experiences… but you would be there together.”

 

Cris huffed, annoyed at herself and her mood swings.

 

“I know, I know… I am just so freaking scared Amy, I am so afraid of big changes and this is definitely one.” the vulnerability in her voice made Amira’s resistance crumble down and she offered Cris the most reassuring smile she could muster.

 

“Cris, I know it’s scary but you are at each other’s side and Joana is not going to leave you behind. So, talk to her, tell her how you feel, tell her about what you’ve been thinking lately… I’m sure she will understand better than anyone else. Besides, who tells you that she’s not having the same doubts right now?”

 

Cris mulled over the words and slowly nodded but didn’t add anything else. After that, the conversation moved to something else lighter, but Amira’s words echoed in Cris’ mind even hours later, reminding her of what Joana had said not so long before.

 

_\- I am not leaving you behind -_

 

She wasn’t and Cris believed her.

 

Now she just needed to find the right way to tell her and hoped to be blessed with a huge smile in Joana’s face. That same smile she had come to love more than everything.

 

***

 

Saying that Cris jumped on Joana the second that she had seen her again, back from Argentina, would’ve been a euphemism.

 

Because Cris did jump on her, making her stumble a little bit, but she also knocked the air out of her lungs with a passionate kiss.

 

Joana was smiling through all of it and Cris just couldn’t be happier.

 

“Hey you.” were Joana’s first words after the kiss was broken.

 

“Hey.” Cris whispered back, planting another quick peck on her girlfriend’s soft lips. “I missed you.”

 

“Yeah, I can see that.” Joana chuckled. “I missed you too, _sapito_.”

 

“Sorry for basically barging into your room while you were unpacking.”

 

Joana rolled her eyes and took Cris’ face between her hands for an eskimo kiss.

 

“Silly, why would I even care about unpacking when I can have you all to myself?”

 

Cris raised an eyebrow in surprise.

 

“Your parents are at home…”

 

“Well, my door can be locked and we can be silent.”

 

Cris didn’t have time to reply cause Joana’s lips were on hers again, but instead of feeling the usual probing of her tongue asking for access, Cris gasped when Joana planted the first open-mouthed kiss on her neck.

 

She was sure she felt Joana’s grin on her skin and the gentle pressure of her hand pulling their bodies closer. Cris clearly remembered the rush of adrenaline that gesture ignited inside her the first time that Joana had done it, in front of all those people at Amira's Iftar. They were all her friends, one way or another, but Cris thought that it might have been the entire world, she didn’t care a single beat.

 

At that moment, just like the first time, Joana was able to light up a spark that no one else seemed ever able to and Cris gripped her shoulders just as forcefully to keep her close.

 

Joana blindly guided them both backward until her legs touched the edge of the bed and she stumbled dragging Cris with her. They both giggled at the irony of the situation, but then promptly resumed their kissing as if breathing in each other’s air was the only thing keeping them alive.

 

With Cris’ legs planted on both sides of Joana’s hips, Joana pulled her closer by the waist, bodies almost crashing into each other, and her hands grazed Cris’ exposed skin. God bless her girlfriend and those colorful crop-tops she loved to wear.

 

Cris’ back arched, as if responding to Joana’s touch was second nature to her, and grasped the back of Joana’s neck to press their lips together more firmly. The heated make-out session came to an abrupt halt when one of Joana’s hands edged at Cris’ bra and the blonde gently pressed her palms against her girlfriend’s shoulders to put some distance.

 

“What’s wrong? Are you okay?” Joana asked immediately, voice soaked with concern.

 

“Yeah, no, everything is fine,” Cris nodded reassuringly. “but your door is not locked and I refuse to have your mom or dad walking on us having sex.”

 

Joana chuckled and rolled her eyes.

 

“I’ll try not to be disappointed by the fact that you were thinking about my mum while kissing me… but you know, it hurts.”

 

Cris jokingly slapped her arm.

 

“ _Idiota_.”

 

Despite her words, she didn’t move an inch from Joana’s lap and she could feel those soft brown eyes staring at her lovingly.

 

When she didn’t say anything, Joana gently bopped her nose with the tip of her finger.

 

“I can hear the gears in your head moving, _sapito_ , what is it that you’re thinking about?”

 

Cris bit her lower lip and lowered her eyes to meet Joana’s curious ones.

 

“Okay, as much as I’d love to continue everything we were doing, would you mind if we talked for a minute?”

 

Joana frowned but didn’t oppose resistance when Cris moved to sit on the floor right in front of her.

 

“It is not exactly how I planned this to go, but of course, go on.”

 

Cris nodded and let her gaze roam her girlfriend’s room before setting her eyes on her and started talking.

 

“Remember when we talked about universities and you told me I could’ve done anything I wanted to?”

 

“Yes, of course.”

 

“Right, so, I figured that since my grades are much better this year I could apply to some universities, like good ones… and the reason why I didn’t say anything at first is because I wanted to be sure and I didn’t want everyone to think I was failing if I didn’t get in… you know”

 

Joana raised the corner of her mouth in half a smile, trying to understand what her girlfriend was trying to say.

 

“Okay, so did you? Apply to them?”

 

“Yes, I did.”

 

“And…? What did they say?”

 

“A couple of them said yes, a couple said – Thank you for your interest but, after careful consideration, we regret to inform you that we have stronger candidates -, but I was still not thinking much about it…” Cris stared at Joana intensely trying to decipher her expression before saying the next words.

 

But Joana seemed curious and confused more than anything else.

 

“Why? What happened?”

 

“I was still waiting to hear back from the last one and then they contacted me and they said yes.”

 

“If you’re about to tell me that Harvard or Yale or some big names took you-”

 

“It was Barcelona, Joana.”

 

Joana blinked and remained in silence for a minute, eyes moving from Cris’ face to her hands.

 

Cris commanded herself to remain still and calm because she had no idea what kind of thoughts were swarming inside Joana’s mind at that moment.

 

Her deep cloud of anxiety was broken by the sound of her girlfriend's little laugh.

 

“Cris, are you telling me that we got into the same University?”

 

“Uh… yeah?” Cris replied, her tone faltering.

 

Joana chuckled again.

 

“And why were you scared to tell me about it?”

 

Cris shrugged.

 

“It’s not that I was scared, I was just… uh okay, maybe a bit scared.”

 

Joana didn’t stop staring at her with the usual intensity of her gaze.

 

“But why?”

 

“Because…” Cris sighed, forcing her eyes to stop roaming Joana’s room and focus only on her girlfriend. “because it’s a big step, it’s a big deal and I was not sure if you… wanted me there.”

 

Joana frowned half amused and half curious.

 

“Why wouldn’t I want you there? What’s so big about it? We’ve been together for more than a year now... our parents know it, our friends know it, we’re happy… aren’t we?”

 

Cris couldn’t help but jump on her feet as soon as she heard the slightest hint of doubt in Joana’s tone and cupped her girlfriend’s face between her hands, leaving a soft peck on her lips.

 

“Of course we are, you know I am the happiest when we’re together.”

 

Joana smiled against Cris’ cheek and stole another quick kiss from her lips.

 

“Then what is it? I am happy to know that we have the chance to be together in uni.”

 

“I am glad as well,” Cris nodded in confirmation. “I just didn’t want you to think that I was only doing it for you and-”

 

“Are you only doing it for me?” Joana interrupted her.

 

“No, of course not… I spent some time wondering what I would’ve liked to do after school. I also considered the gap year, as you suggested, and then I stumbled upon this degree while I was searching the Uni of Barcelona and I wrote to them to get some more information and I realized that… it’s actually something I can see myself doing.”

 

“Okay, so now that this is out of the way, what is bothering you so much?”

 

Cris should’ve imagined that Joana, perceptive as ever, would’ve picked up that there was more than just that feeding her fears.

 

So she braved for the confession, feeling almost embarrassed by what she was about to admit.

 

“The big deal is that I was also thinking about us living together and all of that, you know?” she started rambling. “I couldn’t help but wonder if we’re ready for it or if we shouldn’t even think about something like that right now… I just, I don’t know, I guess it made me think more than it should have, but I didn’t want to bother you and-”

 

“Cris?” Joana stopped her by gently pressing two digits against her mouth. “Take a breath, baby.”

 

Cris giggled and shook her head.

 

“ _Idiota_.”

 

Joana patted the spot on the bed right next to her and waited until Cris got comfortable again.

 

“Look, I think I get it why it’s a big deal for you, really I do…”

 

“But?” asked Cris, feeling something more coming.

 

Joana just shrugged nonchalantly.

 

“Weren’t you the one who told me we should live our lives minute by minute?”

 

Cris smiled fondly at the memory, understanding what Joana was trying to say, she bit her lower lip and nodded.

 

“Yes, but this needs a bit of planning, doesn’t it? I don’t know… grown up stuff freaks me out a little bit and I guess I wouldn’t mind arriving a little more prepared.”

 

Joana tucked a lock of blonde hair behind Cris’ ear and stroked her cheek.

 

She could’ve never got tired of how soft Cris’ skin felt under her touch and how every previous thought seemed to vanish as soon as their bodies brushed each other.

 

Joana always felt as if something precious was being handed to her and sure, time might’ve passed, but it never changed the way she felt when she was around Cris.

 

“And we will plan it, of course. What I am trying to say is that… we don’t have to have it all figure it out, we can still live minute by minute, taking what life will throw at us one step at the time.”

 

Joana could almost physically see all of Cris’ fears slowly crumbling down the more she considered her words. It made her smile because, after all of that time, those same words still had the power of putting everything back in perspective.

 

It didn’t matter how hard something could be, they just needed to resist until the next minute, they just needed to progress slowly, one minute at the time.

 

“Also…” she started again, drawing Cris’ attention back to the conversation. “we don’t have to live together if you don’t want to or if you don’t feel ready for it. We can just have our own space and see how it goes, and maybe later we can talk about sharing a flat.”

 

Cris’ sweet smile grew bigger hearing the honesty behind her girlfriend’s words.

 

“You mean it?”

 

Joana nodded and dipped her head forward, whispering an “Of course I mean it.” before bringing their lips together again.

 

And again.

 

***

 

A couple of days later, Joana woke up to her phone buzzing and a series of messages by Cris.

 

She rubbed her eyes and yawned before focusing on what her girlfriend had sent.

 

_Cris <3:_

_I know we said minute by minute and I know that we meant it, but look at how cute these apartments are, and they are so close to the major campus! Thought they were worth it looking at._

 

Attached there were a series of links with the flats Cris had mentioned.

 

Then the speech bubble appeared again, followed by another message.

 

_Cris <3:_

_Ps: good morning, I hope I didn’t wake you up._

 

Joana smiled and thought that yes, Cris had woken her up, but she didn’t need to know that.

 

When the last message appeared, her smile grew bigger.

 

_Cris <3: _

_PPS: Minute by minute is good, but minute by minute with you is much better._

 

 

  

**Author's Note:**

> Does it look like I can wait 'til 2020 to see them together again? The answer is no. 
> 
> Also, I might be obsessing over the "minuto a minuto" clip and how much I love them with all my heart.
> 
> Also pt.2 I actually looked up the University of Barcelona to see if they offered courses that might fit what I think is the obvious choice for Joana (which was something related to arts and drawings), but I really couldn't figure out what Cris could study and that's the reason why it is very vague and never specified in the one-shot (feel free to let me know which one you think is the best lol). 
> 
> In other news, I hope you like it and I love you all <3


End file.
